A Frog For Asher

Asher's favorite birthday present is a bug habitat. It is a plastic environment that you can put bugs and frogs in and keep them there.

One day, when I reached my office, there was a beautiful tree frog on the keypad of the door to my office. This frog was a particularly beautiful shade of green and had long sticky fingers. I thought to myself that I'd take him home for Asher if he was still there at the end of the day. Sure enough, 5 PM rolled around and the frog hadn't moved from the entry keypad. So I scooped him up, put him in the bug habitat that Asher left in the vehicle and brought him home to Asher.

Needless to say, Asher was thrilled. He was over-the-moon in happiness when he saw the tree frog. It is the first pet that was purely for Asher.

And then I learned just how labor intensive it is to keep a tree frog. They need to eat. They eat live crickets. So you have to go to the pet store on a regular basis and buy live crickets. Then you have to keep the crickets alive. And you have to keep habitats clean. That's a lot of work!

Most importantly, the frog I found was a wild one and belonged back where I found it. So, we took the tree frog on vacation to the beach with us and had a blast sucking up bugs with the bug vacuum (remember that thing we bought after Asher's last endoscopy?) and feeding them to the frog and watching him eat. Then, when we got home, I took Asher to the place I found the frog and we released him together.

I've promised Asher that we'd get him a tadpole and watch him grow into a frog. And he can keep that frog for as long as the frog lives. Hopefully we can feed him frog pellets like the grow-a-frog we inherited from Simi's pre-school class, Sofin. Sofin is MUCH easier to maintain.

Asthma for Asher

A mere day after Asher's birthday, he starts wheezing. Asthma is always worse at night. And it's the worst between the hours of 1 and 3 AM, when you're least likely to head to the emergency room.

So last night, poor Asher is coughing like crazy and there we are with the nebulizer machine, giving the poor kid breathing treatments. And he's complaining of a sore throat, so we're giving him cough medicine (allergen-free cough medicine, of course). Meanwhile, nothing's helping and he's absolutely completely miserable. Needless to say, none of us got any sleep last night.

Now we have a prescription for a year for Pulmicort Respules (I just love that name) in addition to the albuterol treatments, just in case this happens again. Phew!

Good thing we haven't begun a new food trial in awhile.

Our Four Year-Old

Asher is now four. He's thrilled. I think he had a great birthday celebration. On his birthday, he wore his birthday shirt to school and we sang the Beatles' song, "Today is Your Birthday" all the way to school. Then, Raj and I both went to his school at lunch time and sang happy birthday to him and handed out Asher-safe lollipops to him and all his friends. Then, at dinner,
we celebrated some more and he got his birthday present: a frog habitat. And now he has a frog.

Did you know that frogs eat crickets and other live insects? Ick.

Asher's Fourth Birthday

Asher is nearly four. And now we have begun to celebrate.

Our first event was at his paternal grandparent's house. We had a small birthday party, sang happy birthday, and put together the cool puzzle he got as a gift.

Next up was the party at Pump It Up. Asher has been planning this party for about six months now. As you can imagine, this is the party he was the most excited for. He and his friends had a blast playing and running around in these inflatables and sliding down the big slides.

Before his Pump It Up party, we made him a birthday shirt. Both boys loved the idea so much that I think we're going to make this a yearly ritual. We took a plain shirt (actually, it was an old shirt from one of their soccer teams, turned inside out) and decorated it. On one side, it said, "Birthday Boy", "I'm four years old", with all sorts of decorations. On the other side, it said something similar. Both Asher and Simi had a great time while we were making the shirt and Asher loved wearing it.

Leila had to miss Asher's birthday party. Because of the ITP, it was too dangerous for her to be there. With low platelets, her blood won't clot as well as it should. So, if she were to get hit or fall down, particularly on her head, it could have catastrophic results. Thankfully, a great friend offered to baby-sit for her; which we gratefully appreciate. Thank you Charles and Shannon!

We still need to celebrate Asher's birthday at school, then, of course, we need to have a party at home on his actual birthday. Golly, he's going to be worn out by the time his actual birthday comes along!

Leila's First Purse

Every day, walking to and from her room at daycare, Leila insists on carrying her lunch bag. Never mind that the thing is bigger or weighs as much as than she. Mostly, she drags it on the floor behind her as she toddles down the hall.

So today I bought her a purse. It's pink with pictures of pixies (think Tinkerbell) on it. Leila absolutely loves it.

The first item to go into her purse (courtesy of her brothers) were two matchbox cars. Leila carries it on her shoulder, exactly like you should carry a shoulder bag, and she struts her stuff across the room. She's thrilled!

That's my girl!

Tough Week

This has been a tough week in the HinJew household. First issue, of course, is Leila being so sick. The ITP thing is bad enough, but now she's pretty much stopped eating solid foods. It's way too reminiscent of Asher's eating habits pre-ee diagnosis and it has me absolutely terrified. And I can't help but think they're related. I mean, ITP is the body's immune system attacking the platelets. EE is the body's immune system attacking food particles in the body. The body's immune system thinks this food is the enemy, just like it thinks the platelets are the enemy.

Leila's not the only one who has had a tough week. Simi has had a very difficult week in track-out camp. It's really hard seeing your child in difficult situations and it broke my heart watching what he's been going through the first part of this week. He's a trooper, though, and has come through it phenomenally well. He's quite the resilient kid. I'm proud of him. Next week he goes to a different track-out camp. We'll see how things go there.

Asher's feeling ignored with all the commotion around him. Thankfully, he's not suffering any sort of thing! Phew!

Although we're ready for another food trial, we've held off to make sure he's healthy for his birthday celebration. It would really stink to have to miss one's own birthday party due to illness. Plus, we're in the midst of allergy season here and don't want any sort of problem due to environmental allergies messing up the food trials. Best to be patient and wait for the ragweed and grass allergies to wane a bit before introducing another food.

Thankfully, this week is nearly over. Let's hope next week is a better one.

ITP

Leila has ITP. She got it as a result of the MMR vaccine.

The doctor explained that a person normally has about 100,000 platelets in their body. Anything under 40,000 is bad. When we brought Leila into the doctor yesterday, she had 4,000 platelets.

This morning, after treatment, the platelets were up to 18,000.

Simi Update

Simi just completed his first quarter of school. Now he has three weeks of vacation. How cool is that?

Simi is absolutely loving school. He's doing incredibly well. He has math twice a day, which he loves. He also does a lot of reading, writing, and listening comprehension. Every day they have a different special: either gym, art, music, computer, or one other thing which I forget right now. He loves it all.

His reading is amazing. He's reading very fluidly right now. He's on level 16 of books, if that means anything to anyone. He is also working on his writing and doing first grade math. I'm so incredibly grateful that he's in the K/1 combination class and can do the math with the first graders. He is just absolutely loving it.

Simi also just started violin lessons. We just got Simi a little Suzuki violin - it's teeny tiny! Both boys continue to take swim lessons on Saturday mornings.

So now Simi is on vacation for three weeks. We enrolled him in one camp this week and a different one next week - just to see which (or both) he likes the best. There are lots of camp options, so we'll try a bunch and see which he likes the best. I've checked out these camps and they look like a lot of fun. In fact, I'd like to participate!

And that's our latest Simi update.

Baking Powder and Cocoa Powder

Here is an update on Asher's food trials: we've declared baking powder (featherweight) a success and have moved on to the next trial: cocoa powder. Cocoa powder enables Asher to have chocolate cookies and cupcakes. It is also rich in antioxidents which is difficult for him to get elsewhere.

When we first approached Asher with the idea of trialing cocoa powder, Asher absolutely immediately said, "NO!" His eyes got big and he said it in a very serious, absolute way. His reaction took both Raj and me by surprise, until we asked him why he felt that way. He's allergic to chocolate, he said, and it will make him sick. It took a good bit for us to talk him through the idea of trialing cocoa powder to see if he is, indeed, allergic to it. We also explained the difference between cocoa powder and chocolate bars, to which he is definitely allergic (it has milk and soy in it).

So, during nap time, Raj went to work making chocolate cupcakes and chocolate cookies. They're absolutely delicious! Apparently, Asher thinks so too because he ate nearly all the cookies AND several of the cupcakes. Cocoa powder is rocking Asher's world.

Let's cross our fingers and toes on this one. On the allergenic scale, cocoa powder is a wild card. We just have no clue at how Asher's body will respond to it.

Raj has been doing an absolutely amazing job in baking! He is figuring out the mixture of rice flour, millet flour, baking powder, and banana (and now cocoa powder) to make some amazing creations. I know that I couldn't do what he's doing. We're very fortunate!

Cephalexin, Baking Powder, and Crickets

It's been awhile since we've had a food trial update. So here's the latest news:

We stopped the grapes on August 5th. Two days after we stopped the grapes, Asher was back to his old self. I think this change in his personality was further proof that grapes did Asher's body no good.

On August 12th, right at the point where we could trial something else, Asher came down with a fever. Since it was four days after Simi was diagnosed with strep throat, we took him to the pediatrician immediately, who prescribed Cephalexin, an antibiotic. So, we had to trial Cephalexin. Now we know that Asher can tolerate that medication.

Next up was baking powder. But here's where it gets tricky, because now we have to look at the ingredients of the ingredients. Some baking powders contain corn starch. Since Asher is allergic to corn, eating corn starch is bad too. Some baking powders contain aluminum, which have its own issues. So we had to buy special baking powder which contains potato starch instead of corn starch and is aluminum free.

Did I hear you ask, "Why baking powder?" and "How in the world do you trial baking powder?". One word: COOKIES. OK, here's another word: MUFFINS. Raj is doing an amazing job mixing rice flour, millet flour, sugar and baking powder to make cookies, muffins, and fried foods. He fries cauliflower and pork (think chicken nuggets) and all sorts of stuff to give Asher the crunchy salty treats he loves.

If you're wondering why we chose baking powder, Asher's birthday is coming up and we're trying to get enough ingredients for a cake. Or cupcake.

So the other day Asher asks if he could trial crickets. Asher wants to eat crickets. "Sure thing, Asher", I reply, much to Raj's surprise. You can trial crickets if you want. Raj made a batch of just fried dough blobs and we call them crickets. Here are your crickets Asher, we say. Some are small fried dough strings and we call those the cricket legs or cricket antennae. Some are big blobs - and those are the cricket bodies. Other's are small round blobs - those are the cricket heads. Nice and crunchy. It's no surprise that our bug catcher absolutely loves eating crickets.

If you're wondering, all those things: Cephalexin, baking powder, and Asher crickets seem safe to eat.

Reader Asher

Just like his big brother, Asher is reading at age three. Truthfully, he is in the beginning stages of reading - putting the sounds of the letters together to form words. Then, once he has a word completed, he moves onto the next word in the sentence and continues along until he has read the entire sentence. Then we talk about the sentence, so that he understands it. Then he continues along until he's read everything on the page. And we talk about the page. Then, everything on all the pages until he has read the entire book. And then we talk about the book. So, I guess that means he's reading, right?

We have been reading the BOB books, but then a neighbor told us about this amazing Web site. It's free and fun and we all love it. Asher BEGS to read from the Starfall site.


And here's another post where we're talking about Asher and not ee! Gotta love it!

Confession Time

OK, it's confession time: Leila and Asher are Jerry Garcia fans.

To be fair, they're also David Grisman fans. And fans of They Might be Giants. And also fans of Antonio Vivaldi, along with G F Handel. Not to mention anything which even remotely sounds like a song for children. I guess you might say they have eclectic musical tastes.

Our current favorite is "Not for Kids Only", by Jerry Garcia and David Grisman. Leila rocks to "Jenny Jenkins" while Asher's current favorite (and mine too) is "There Ain't No Bugs On Me". We all like "Hot Corn Cold Corn". I can almost envision these two chaps sitting in front of each other, one with a guitar and the other with a mandolin, jamming away. I can even envision it being a regular event. Gosh, what a treat it would have been to be present at one of those events! Raffi who?

So if the next time you see Leila and she has flowers in her hair and singing "Sugar Magnolia", you'll understand why.

Feisty Girl

There's no doubt who rules the roost here: Leila. This little half-pint is FEISTY and she makes sure that she gets what she wants. Heaven help you if you try to change her nappy when she doesn't want to be taken away from her brothers or if you try to take a toy away from her. If you make her mad, she'll HIT you!

She's also tremendously funny - especially considering that she's a mere 19 months old. It definitely seems like she's heading into a successful career as a comedienne.

Today we went to the swimming pool. I was shocked when Leila plunged into the cold water, lay on her back and even let her ears get wet (unheard of for a baby her age). And she even did some kicking when I encouraged her to kick.

That's a smart girl!

School of Choice

When I was a child, there was no doubt which school I was going to attend. I went to the public school which was located closest to my house. End of discussion.

Here in North Carolina, we have choices. There is the base school option, which is the school closest to one's house which operates on the traditional calendar year (September to June). Then there are the year-round schools. Those schools have sessions which last for nine weeks, then everyone gets a three week break. Next are the magnet schools. Those are generally schools in "low performing" areas. The magnet schools are generally renovated VERY nicely and pumped full of resources and given a theme to entice folks to send their children to that school. For example, here in Durham, we have a gifted and talented magnet school, an arts and humanities magnet school, one for languages, and several more which I can't think of right now. And then there are the charter schools. They are free for all residents of North Carolina but operate like a private school. And, of course, there are private schools, but students' families have to pay for those.

So last year was the start of the search for the proper elementary school for our children in preparation for Simi's transition to Kindergarten. After a lot of research and attending each school's open house sessions, I narrowed down the choices to five and applied to those. Simi was accepted to the second choice school and wait listed for the first choice school.

As you know, he started the year at the second choice school. It's an excellent school and we all love his teachers, his fellow students, and are very satisfied with the education he's getting there.

And then we get the call from the first choice school: we have a spot there if we're interested. Of course, we have to let them know in 24 hours otherwise they will offer the spot to the next child on the list.

Raj and I went to visit the school. It's absolutely a phenomenal school. It has Spanish instruction, amazing art program, excellent music program, a Montessori approach to learning, and very close to our offices. One of his best friends from pre-school is also in Kindergarten there. Plus, it goes through middle school. Most of the children there are learning two or three grade levels above their age. But, we like where he's at too. So...which do we choose?

This decision is one which will affect all three of our children's elementary and middle school education. It's one which will influence their education, friends and environment for nine years of their lives. It doesn't get more important that this.

Durham public schools generally have a bad reputation. Can it be possible that we would choose a Durham public school over one of the most coveted public schools in the area?

It was an agonizing decision, but we chose to keep Simi at the school he is currently in. While we'll never know the impact of the decision, I just hope we made the right choice.

Asher's Frog

Here in North Carolina, it's been a sweltering 100+ degrees Fahrenheit this week. Today, it's a relatively temperate 94. Asher was extremely disappointed to hear that he couldn't go outside today to look for bugs. Although I suggested he go look for bugs inside the house, he didn't seem to want to do that.

So imagine the surprise when Asher managed to catch a frog in the dining room. It was alive and covered completely in lint (I do clean the house - promise!). It was a good size for a frog, between 2-3 inches. We're still trying to figure out how he managed to get in the house!

Raj speculates that Asher has magical powers and willed the frog to come into the house. Truth is, only Asher could find a frog inside the house.

And here is one post where Asher is mentioned and NOT EE!

Farewell, Moss Randolph

My great-uncle, step-grandfather passed away yesterday. While I've been expecting the news for quite sometime, I was quite unprepared for his actual death. He died alone, much like he's spent his entire life.

Before I knew him, Moss was my grandmother's brother-in-law. He was my grandfather's brother. Except my real grandfather died well before I was born (when my mum was 17) so I never knew him. And since my father's father also died well before I was born, Moss was really the only grandfather I ever knew.

Some 20+ years after the death of his brother, Moss and my grandmother met at some family function and sparks flew. Moss confessed that he had always been in love with her and they started some long-distance courting. Moss lived in Los Angeles, CA while my grandmother lived in New York City. It wasn't too long before they married and my grandmother moved out to Los Angeles to be with Moss. As a young teen, I spent school holidays and summer vacations in Los Angeles with them.

You know, I remember Moss telling me stories of when he grew up, but now I can't remember them. I'd give anything to hear one of those stories again. But one thing I do remember is how much he idolized his big brother, my grandfather, and followed him to McGill University and became an engineer. See, they grew up in Canada. He found his way down to the United States and took a job here, took a job there - more interested in the adventure than in settling down and starting a family. He spent some time in Mexico. Then he spent some time in southwest US before settling down in sunny California. Even after he married my grandmother, he would take her on adventures. They went to live in Chile for awhile and traveled to lots of other places. I think he and I are a lot alike.

I loved to listen to his stories. Sometimes, he'd tell me the same story over and over again. It's been so long since I've heard him tell me a story that I can barely remember them. I'd give anything to hear one of his stories again.

When I was a kid and would visit him in Los Angeles, he and I would go for a run every day. Then, after dinner, we'd go play billiards in the apartment building where he and my grandmother lived. One day he came home after stopping at the public library. He had a bunch of books on how to play pool. He poured over those books in his typical engineer-style. I wasn't interested in reading about angles or strategy. He got to be a really good pool player; I still stink at the game.

The 1984 Olympics were in Los Angeles. I managed to get some tickets and Moss and I went to see Mary Decker, my idol, run. Actually, we saw her fall, but that's a different story for another time. We watched the men's steeplechase and a lot of other events. I'll never forget that day. We asked a stranger to take our photo. I still treasure that photo.

Another time, after he and my grandmother retired and moved to Florida, I visited them there. I had a watch where you could enter some metrics and it would calculate the distance you ran. In his true engineer style, he measured my stride by measuring distance ran by number of strides between two light posts so that we could enter the accurate stride length into the watch. His calculation was perfect.

Then, my grandmother got sick. She was dying. He was the one who took care of her. He did everything for her. He got one hour off each day when a nurse came in to watch over her while he took a break. He never complained. He just stayed there with her until the very end. I was in graduate school at the time.

A year later, I flew down to Florida to visit him during the one year anniversary of my grandmother's death. Her clothes and stuff were just where she left them. It almost seemed like she was going to walk in the door any minute. I helped him get rid of her stuff. I bawled my eyes out but he didn't cry at all. He loved her more than anything, but to him, it was just stuff. And he didn't really have much emotional attachment to stuff.

I loved our time together. Moss came to visit me once when I lived in Takoma Park, MD. I remember eating turkey burgers on our screened in back porch and he was telling me and my roommates stories. They were mesmerized by his stories and would ask questions. He'd tell story after story. After he left, my roommates begged for him to come back to visit.

He came to visit me one year at the farm I lived on in Durham, NC. I remember him washing my truck. He had a particular brand of soap he loved to use and a particular cloth - just perfect for washing cars. He did a great job on my truck - better than I had ever done.

At the farm, we sat on my front porch and watched the cows in the field. He was an old man by then and we no longer ran together. Instead, I'd go for a run and he'd wait for me to come back. He met my friends; they'd always ask me when he was returning for a visit. Everyone loved Moss. I'd ask him why he never married before he married my grandmother. He'd shrug his shoulders and not say much. I guess he was too much of a free spirit to really settle down much. Everyone loved him, but he spent a lot of time alone.

One time he came to visit me right after I bought my first house. He helped me prune the trees in the yard. He picked up the pitch fork and said he wanted to turn the soil so that I could have a garden. " Tarheel soil is clay, Moss.", I said. "It's hard to turn. You're going to hurt yourself." But he insisted. "OK. I'm going to go for a run, then", I said. "I'll be back after a few miles. " He picked up the pitch fork and stuck it in the ground. I trotted across the street to begin my run. I didn't get even 1/4 mile before I turned around, terrified that he was going to hurt himself while turning the soil. When I returned, he looked relieved. I asked him if he wanted a glass of ice tea. He put down the pitch fork and gratefully followed me inside the house for a glass of cold ice tea. We never talked about the garden again.

About a year after that visit, he suffered a stroke and he never recovered. I wanted him to come live with me, but my uncle insisted he stay in a nursing home in Connecticut near my uncle. I'm grateful to my uncle because I probably wouldn't have met the man I married, nor would I have had my three wonderful children if I had to take care of Moss after his stroke. However, having Moss in such a horrible place was painful. It was a horrible place - the kind of place where one can easily lose their mind. It pained me just to think of him there. Here was a man so full of life stuck in a place so full of insanity. Just that thought made me crazy. He deserved so much better.

He couldn't make it to my wedding. And he never met my daughter. I wanted so badly to name one of my children after him, but couldn't. And now he's dead and all I have are these fading memories.

Goodbye, sweet Moss. I love you more than anything. If there is a heaven, you, more than anyone deserve to be there. I miss you.

Post Grapes

OK, we pulled grapes out of Asher's diet and now he's like a different kid. It's like someone flipped a switch and we got a new Asher. He's happier, goofier, and more energetic. He isn't so hard to get out of bed in the morning.

I guess it was the right thing to do.

End of the grapes (for now)

On day 10 of the grape trial, we finally pulled the plug on the grapes. Asher's tummy ache, which began as soon as he started eating grapes, never went away and his food intake has taken a nose dive. Thing is, when Asher has a reaction to a food, it's different from this reaction, so we're not convinced that this is a food failure. At any rate, we did decide to remove it from Asher's diet.

As soon as we made the decision, Asher began to ask for grape juice. Then he said that his tummy ache disappeared. He's really sad that he can't have grapes or grape juice for awhile. Truthfully, so am I.

Today I went to Whole Foods to get some things for Asher. While there, I was looking around at the breads and cheeses and cakes and pastries and I just started to cry. I literally burst into tears while looking at the cheeses. Here was this huge store fool of delicious food and Asher will never get to eat any of it. It made me really sad for him. So, there I was, bawling my eyes out and I walked over to the check-out counter, saw a really nice nutcracker on-sale for half price and I bought it - all the while thinking, "this is a really wasteful purchase; when are we ever going to be cracking nuts in this house?" Which got me even more sad and crying more. So, then it was my turn to check out and I looked up at the cashier, who was of Indian descent and on her name tag was the name, "Laila". Good golly, a woman of Indian descent with a Hebrew name? What a coincidence! So, we talked for a bit, all the while I had tears in my eyes and the cashier didn't say a word about my tears. And then I come home to a tearful Asher who wants to drink grape juice but can't.

Tiddley Toddler

Leila wants to do EVERYTHING her big brothers do. She follows them everywhere, even when they're in time-out, she toddlers over to them and plays with them. So it's not surprising that when she sees them pee in the potty, she wants to do the same thing. So one day I said, "OK, Leila, do you want to make a pee-pee in the potty too?" Leila responded with a "pee-pee too", and proceeded to pull off her nappy, walk over to the toilet, and stand in front of it just like her big brothers.

So we pulled out the plastic potty and now she knows to sit on it, although she doesn't know that she's supposed to do something other than sit while she's there. But, heck, she's only 18 months old. She'll figure it out in due time.

Grapes, Day Eight

By now you would think we'd have an idea of how well grapes are treating Asher. Truthfully, the jury is still out. It's probably okay, but this food trial has not been the "slam dunk" that the other trials have been. We'll give it another week and see how it goes.

My last blog entry, on day four of the grape trial, Asher had a really bad stomach ache and gastrointestinal distress. Raj rightly pointed out that grapes are quite acidic and Asher hasn't had something like that in his system for a very long time. Raj had tried to prepare me for potential gastrointestinal distress with the bacon trial - something that could cause a shock to Asher's system but wasn't an allergic reaction. However, with bacon, that reaction didn't happen (and the kid eats A LOT of bacon!). Perhaps grapes are just a shock to Asher's adorable little body and that it's not an allergic reaction. We'll give it another week.

Asher hasn't eaten any grapes in two days. In fact, today he ate very little. Yes, it's quite concerning. But he doesn't have some of the other symptoms of ee - tiredness, achyness, queasy stomach, vomiting. So, we'll see. And that's why the jury is still out.